Material Beliefs

An Italian parks his brand new Porsche in front of the office to show it off to his colleagues. As he’s getting out of the car, a truck comes speeding along too close to the kerb and takes off the door before speeding off. More than a little distraught, the Italian grabs his mobile and calls the police. Five minutes later, the police arrive.
Before the policeman has a chance to ask any questions, the Italian starts screaming hysterically:
“My Porsche, my beautiful silver Porsche is ruined. No matter how long it spends at the panel beaters it’ll simply never be the same again!”

After the Italian finally finishes his rant, the policeman shakes his head in disgust:
“I can’t believe how materialistic you Italians are,” he says.
“You lot are so focused on your possessions that you don’t notice anything else in your life.”

“How can you say such a thing at a time like this?”, snaps the Italian.

The policeman replies, “Didn’t you realise that your arm was torn off when the truck hit you?”

The Italian looks down in absolute horror and screams………

“Aaaaaargh!!! Where’s my Rolex???”

Blond Fishing

Two blonds rented a boat and went fishing.

After finding a good location, the first blond told the second one to mark the spot so when they came back they would be able to find it again.

On the way home, the first one asked,
“How did you mark that spot?”

The reply was,
“I put an X on the bottom of the boat.”

To that, the first blond said,
“You idiot! How do you know we’ll get the same boat next time?”